Introduction

Effective communication is a crucial aspect of social-emotional learning. One important skill that students can develop is the ability to ask for help or favors using both direct and indirect methods. Direct requests involve stating what one wants clearly, while indirect requests involve talking around the subject without explicitly stating the desired outcome. Understanding when to use each method can help students navigate various social situations and build stronger relationships with their peers.

No-Prep Activity

Here is a simple, no-prep activity that can help students practice using direct and indirect requests:

1. Divide the class into pairs.
2. Assign each student a role: one will be the “requester” and the other will be the “helper.”
3. Give the requester a list of three tasks they need help with (e.g., borrowing a pen, getting help with homework, or finding a partner for a group project).
4. Ask the requester to come up with a direct and an indirect way to ask their partner for help with each task.
5. Have the pairs take turns practicing both types of requests, and encourage the helper to respond naturally to each one.
6. After each request, the pair should discuss how each method made them feel and why they think one method might be more appropriate than the other in certain situations.

Discussion Questions

1. What are the benefits and drawbacks of using a direct request? How about an indirect request?
2. How might the relationship between the requester and the helper impact which method is more appropriate to use?
3. In what situations might it be more important to use an indirect request?
4. How can being aware of others’ feelings and preferences help you decide whether to use a direct or indirect request?
5. How can practicing both types of requests help improve your overall communication skills?

Related Skills

Teaching students the difference between direct and indirect requests can also help them develop other important social-emotional skills, such as:

• Active listening: Understanding the importance of truly hearing and considering what others are saying in order to respond appropriately.
• Empathy: Being able to put oneself in another person’s shoes and understand their feelings and perspective.
• Assertiveness: Expressing one’s needs and desires clearly and respectfully, without being aggressive or passive.
• Conflict resolution: Finding effective ways to resolve disagreements and misunderstandings between individuals or groups.

Next Steps

Now that you have a better understanding of direct and indirect requests and their importance in social-emotional learning, we encourage you to continue exploring more skills and activities to use in your classroom. To get started, sign up for free sample materials from Everyday Speech, which includes engaging activities, videos, and resources to support your students’ social-emotional growth.