Strong friendship skills serve as the cornerstone for connected, supportive peer relationships that foster growth and belonging in middle school students. For many students, understanding what friendship actually looks and feels like in practice can be challenging.

Related resources: See our full list of social skills lessons.

Educators, clinicians, and related service providers are uniquely positioned to guide students in developing these essential behaviors. The “Acting Like a Friend” goal poster from Everyday Speech offers a clear, supportive visual to anchor lessons and spark meaningful discussions about the actions that build healthy friendships.

What Are Friendship Skills?

Friendship skills refer to the set of behaviors, attitudes, and understandings that help students establish, maintain, and deepen positive peer relationships. In the middle school setting, these competencies go beyond basic social courtesies. They encompass the ability to show empathy, resolve conflicts, communicate effectively, offer support, and choose actions that build trust and respect. Acting like a friend means consistently using these skills in ways that encourage closeness, rather than simply knowing what friendship is in theory.

Middle school is a developmental stage where peer opinions and relationships increasingly shape students’ self-concept, participation in class, and emotional well-being. Yet, this period is also marked by rapid social changes, shifting group dynamics, and an intense drive for belonging. Many students need explicit instruction and ongoing reinforcement to navigate these complexities. Friendship skills, therefore, serve as both preventive and proactive strategies for helping students thrive academically, emotionally, and socially.

Why Teach Friendship Skills?

Focusing on friendship skills benefits students and educators in several key ways.

• Encourages emotionally safe classrooms where students feel connected and accepted
• Reduces the likelihood of peer conflicts and misunderstandings
• Promotes positive communication and active listening
• Supports inclusion for students with social learning challenges
• Provides strategies for resolving disagreements respectfully
• Strengthens self-esteem and resilience
• Helps prevent social isolation, bullying, and exclusion
• Equips students to seek support and offer it to others
• Promotes a sense of belonging and community within the group
• Contributes to improved academic engagement and motivation

Teaching friendship skills during middle school can have lasting effects far beyond the classroom, setting the stage for healthy relationships in adolescence and adulthood.

Lesson Plan: Using Acting Like a Friend

The “Acting Like a Friend” goal poster is a no-prep visual teaching tool designed to clarify and reinforce the actions that reflect true friendship. This poster provides concrete examples that are developmentally appropriate and resonate with the everyday experiences of middle school students.

Step 1: Setting the Stage

Begin by introducing the concept of friendship skills explicitly. Invite students to reflect, either independently or in pairs, on what it means to be a friend and to consider the kinds of behaviors that help them feel included and valued. Frame this discussion by emphasizing that friendship is not just about having things in common or spending time together, but about specific choices and actions. If group norms are not already established, set expectations for respectful discussion and active listening.

Display the “Acting Like a Friend” poster in a prominent location. Explain that this visual will serve as a guide for the discussion and as a reference point throughout the school year.

Step 2: Exploring the Poster Together

Review each point on the poster as a group. The poster highlights actionable steps such as “Include people,” “Respect others’ opinions,” “Listen when a friend is talking,” and “Apologize when you make a mistake.” Invite students to discuss what each behavior might look like in different settings such as the classroom, cafeteria, or after-school activities.

Encourage students to share examples from their own experiences (real or hypothetical) when they or others demonstrated these friendship skills. For example, ask:

• How did it feel when someone included you in a new group?
• What does apologizing sincerely sound like?
• How can respecting different opinions make a friendship stronger?

Writing these examples on the board or a shared digital document helps anchor the discussion and allows students to see diverse perspectives in action.

Step 3: Practicing Friendship Behaviors

After unpacking the poster’s messages, provide structured opportunities for students to practice. Use role-plays or scenarios that capture real challenges students may face. For instance, create short skits where one student has to include another in a conversation, or where a disagreement needs to be resolved using the steps outlined on the poster.

Divide students into pairs or small groups and assign them a behavior from the poster. Ask them to create and act out a short scene that demonstrates the assigned skill. For example, a group practicing “Listen when a friend is talking” might role-play a conversation where active listening is shown by body language, eye contact, and paraphrasing.

Take time to debrief after each role-play. Guide the class to notice positive behaviors, ask clarifying questions, and reflect on how each action supports friendship.

Step 4: Setting Individual and Group Goals

Invite students to choose one behavior from the poster to serve as a personal goal for the week or month. Have them write a plan for how they will practice this skill in their daily lives—whether it is including a classmate in groupwork, apologizing when needed, or reaching out to someone new.

Optionally, create a classroom challenge or “Friendship Skills Tracker” where students can celebrate when they notice themselves or others acting like a friend. Highlight effort and improvement rather than perfection.

Step 5: Integrating Into Daily Routines

Encourage regular, brief check-ins that reference the poster’s language. For example, begin class by asking, “Who wants to share an example of including someone this week?” or “What did you do to show respect for differing opinions today?” These check-ins remind students that friendship skills are relevant every day and valued in the school environment.

Consider keeping the poster visible and referring to it when addressing group conflicts or disruptions as a neutral tool for guiding students back to specific helpful behaviors. Consistent reinforcement is key to moving these skills from awareness into daily habit.

Supporting Friendship Skills After the Activity

Transferring friendship behaviors from structured lessons to real-life interactions takes ongoing support. Here are some ways to provide that scaffolding:

• Model positive friendship skills throughout all student interactions. Actions often speak louder than lessons.
• Reinforce skills with specific praise, such as “I noticed you listened carefully when your partner was speaking.”
• Offer gentle prompts in challenging moments, such as “How could we use the skills from our poster to solve this disagreement?”
• Facilitate peer feedback, allowing students to identify and celebrate acts of friendship in one another.
• Encourage reflection by having students journal or discuss their successes and challenges using specific language from the poster.
• Work in partnerships with families, communicating classroom efforts to build friendship skills and suggesting ways to reinforce these at home.
• Provide additional support for students who struggle with specific aspects, such as joining groups or handling conflicts, by breaking down skills into smaller steps or providing extra practice.

Regular follow-up helps students internalize the behaviors described and understand that friendship is an ongoing, active process.

Wrapping Up: Building a Culture of Friendship

Equipping middle school students with robust friendship skills creates classrooms where every student feels empowered to connect, contribute, and belong. The “Acting Like a Friend” poster offers a concrete, accessible entry point for discussion, skill practice, and ongoing reflection. By making friendship skills a visible, shared priority, educators send a clear message that healthy relationships matter. As students practice the behaviors that build trust, respect, and caring, they gain tools that enrich their academic experience and prepare them for lifelong success in relationships. With consistent reinforcement and a collaborative approach, every student can grow into a friend others are glad to know. For additional resources or to access the poster, visit the download page.