Full Curriculum Friendship Handling Conflicts with Friends

Handling Conflicts with Friends

Conflicts can arise often for children with weaknesses in perspective taking, self-regulation, and problem solving. Handling Conflicts teaches resolutions in a slow, step-by-step process that removes the emotions so that sound decisions can be made with others’ feelings in mind.

Sample Video:

Fighting With Friends

SOCIAL SKILLS IN ACTION (SSIA) – Jeff and Mike have a misunderstanding and get upset with each other. Rather than communicating, Mike starts yelling at Jeff and turns a small problem into a big one.

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Narrator: Sometimes, we get into fights with our friends because we don’t understand their point of view, or because they did something we don’t like. We need to communicate with the other person and tell them what’s wrong. That way, they understand how we are feeling. If we take a break to calm down and think about the other person, we can solve our problems. Let’s watch what happens when Mike and Jeff are fighting.


<SCENE 1 Classroom>

(Boy 1 approaches boy 2 and confronts him.)

Mike: Hey Jeff, I need to talk to you.

Jeff: What’s up? 

Mike: I think what you did was really rude.

Jeff: What’s wrong?

Mike: You know I was taking everybody to the arcade on Friday night. I thought you were coming too.

Jeff: Yeah, I am. What’s wrong?

Mike: Forget it. I don’t want to talk to you anymore.

Jeff: I don’t want to talk to you either.


(Boy 1 angrily turns away from boy 2. Boy 2 angrily crosses his arm across his chest.)


Narrator: Uh-oh. How do you think Jeff and Mike are feeling right now? Let’s see.


Mike: (internal thought) Jeff invited everyone over when I already had plans with them. He’s trying to take my friends away from me.


Narrator: Mike is very upset with Jeff. Let’s see how Jeff feels.


Jeff: (internal thought) Mike is yelling at me and I don’t even know why. He made me really angry.


Narrator: Jeff is confused and angry. He doesn’t even know what the problem is. Mike needs to explain why he is upset. He and Jeff can talk about the problem and come up with a good solution. Let’s watch Mike try again.


<SCENE 1 Classroom>

(Boy 1 approaches boy 2 and confronts him.)

Mike: Hey Jeff, I need to talk to you.

Jeff: What’s up?

Mike: I think what you did was really rude.

Jeff: What did I do?

Mike: You know I was taking everybody to the arcade on Friday. Why aren’t you coming?

Jeff: Yeah, I am. What’s the problem?


Mike: (internal thought) (think about others icon pops up.) Jeff is acting like he doesn’t know what I’m talking about. I should tell him why I’m mad.


Mike: (out loud) I invited everybody to the arcade on Friday and you invited everybody to your house on the same day. Why did you do that?

Jeff: Dude, I’m so sorry. I thought that was next week. I’ll tell my friends to come over another time.

Mike: Oh, I thought it didn’t make sense.


Narrator: Mike and Jeff solved their problems by communicating with each other. Mike let Jeff know he was feeling upset and explained why. Remember, if you get into a fight with a friend, tell them how you are feeling and stop to think about their feelings too. It’s much easier to solve a problem that way.


Companion Worksheet:

Every video comes with a companion worksheet for students to review what they just learned. This helps assess comprehension and promote generalization by reinforcing the concepts covered in the video.

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